i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Houston, we have a blender
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
The feeling are messing with the penis
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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