This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
