i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
