do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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