the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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