I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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