The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
