"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
