So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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