This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
