If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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