Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize