If that was your dad, he is hot
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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