I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
he's gonorrhea incarnate
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
