the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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