note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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