Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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