if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
