Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
