you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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