if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
