I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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