This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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