can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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