Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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