ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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