Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Randomize
