Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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