She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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