: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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