I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
