Apparently you make a good broom.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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