dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
