A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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