i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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