Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize