Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
