I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
