Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize