there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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