ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
