Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I just googled if crying burns calories
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
