Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
