I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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