You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Randomize
