Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
