It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
one might say we're banned from that church
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
