Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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