we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
