Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
